A Day of Thanks...

Today is a day to reflect on all that I am grateful for and I would like to share it.

I am grateful for my daughter. I just didn't know that I had such a capacity for love and that anyone would ever so deeply and unconditionally love me back. She is light, love, laughter and joy all wrapped up in a whirling, spinning, giggling, singing bundle of girlie-ness. I am so incredibly blessed - I thank GOD every day...every single day.

I am grateful that I can work from my home.

I am grateful for my family - My parents whom I adore. My brother and sister and their spouses. My precious nieces and nephews who are all my children as well. My in-laws. My cousins. I am truly blessed. They love me no matter what, they have an unending generosity of spirit.

I am grateful for my beautiful home in my beautiful city. I live in San Francisco! - not many people get to say that. My home is my sanctuary, my place of balance, of renewal and of safety.

My tribe - my incredible tribe that has been with me for many many years - you know who you are. You are the family I chose.

My friends, what on earth would I do without you.

For dancing - it makes me feel alive.

For the creative work that I do - it stops time and space.

For my spirituality - it gives me hope when I have none. It reminds me of the impermanence of things. It reminds me that all situations are an illusion. It reminds me that shit happens to everyone - but it is what I DO WITH IT, that matters most. It reminds me that the journey is the adventure not the destination. It reminds me that the wisdom and answer to all of my questions lie within. It reminds me that a compassionate heart gives light to the world.

I am grateful that I can have a bit of a break from working and my husband will help me. I tell him often - I hope he know and can hear it.

Funny enough, I am grateful for my stuggles - because they are helping me be a stronger and hopefully wiser woman.

Happy Thanksgiving and many many blessings to you all.

Di

GOSSIP...

I wasn't exactly sure how I was going to broach the subject but it has been on my mind this week.

I learned at a very early age that if you say something about someone; you should, if confronted, be able to say whatever it was you were saying to the person you were gossiping about. Tough lesson at 17 but I fessed up, told the truth, apologized and walked through the fire.

Unfortunately, gossip is an addictive mistress. Once you get started it is hard to stop. Doesn't matter if you are 15 or 48, or 79. Doesn't matter if you have vowed to yourself to stop the gossip. Sigh, I try so hard.

This week several friends were gossiping about two of my other dear dear friends. I was drinking a beer and just sat there with a stomach ache and an overwhelming need to stop it. It seems that friend 1 was complaining about friend 2 for being inappropriate. All I could think of was - we are all inappropriate at one time or another including friend 1. But my two beer buddies were really carrying on. So finally I had to say it - that I was disturbed by what I was hearing. I stated that friend 1 and 2 were dear friends to each other and that they should be talking to each other instead of friend 1 gossiping to my beer friends. Oh what tangled web we weave... none-the-less beer friends were using it as fuel to put down friend 2. Not good. So the only foolish blather that came out of my mouth was some sort of incoherent comment about if friend 1 gossiped so about friend 2 - what must people say about me. I too have been in appropriate as has friend 1. We have all been inappropriate.

None-the-less one of the beer friends went on about how they expect people to talk about them and they don't care. Pretty much ignored my comment and continued.

Sigh...

Do you care if you are gossip fodder, or would you rather someone tell you the truth about something you are doing?

Frankly I would prefer to be confronted with something I am doing wrong then to have people gossip behind my back. Gossip sucks positive energy, kills friendships, and will leave you lonely.

If you gossip - Stop, if you can't stop then at least have the decency to confide in someone who will keep your words in confidence.

I don't want to hear crap about my friends - they are my friends! I know they aren't perfect-neither am I. I know they sometimes make really stupid decisions - so do I. I know they are sometimes inappropriate - so am I.

Enough said - PEACE!!

WOW, What a week...

This week we elected Barak Obama as our 44th President. And in an instant - the energy around the world changed. People around the world breathed a collective sigh of relief.

People of color (and I include myself being hispanic) there are no more excuses. We need to take our overwhelming sense of pride and do something constructive with it. At this moment every individual can change their world and maybe the entire world. What are you going to do with your opportunity? Are you going to wait for our new President to try and do it alone. Or, are we going to also make a difference.

Then, in what seems like another reality. Our gay brothers and sisters have found themselves is an awful situation. Their right to marry whom they want has been ripped from them. I am so angry, and I have to funnel that into being proactive. Religious groups and churches have poured millions and millions of dollars into California; the same churches fed fear into their parishioners; polarizing and not true statements were made in campaign ads. Honestly, I am of the belief that if you preach politics from the pulpit then you should lose your non-profit status. I believe we all support the separation of church and state....right?

Good night dear readers. Tomorrow I take my dear daughter and niece to the opera - this should be fun. Have a great weekend.

Enough Already!!!!

Are you as sick of this election as I am!

I am tired of all of the "vote for me" calls to my home and office - STOP CALLING ME!

I am tired of the polarization of our county and the fools that are feeding it.

I am tired of campaign handlers.

I am sickened by the amount of money donated for these elections - can you imagine what we could do with those sums?

I am tired of the posturing.

I am really sick and tired of people calling themselves mavericks - when that is something someone else says about you. "We are mavericks" is simply wrong.

I am sickened by the fact that people want to vote for someone they can have BBQ and drink a beer with. That is absurd - don't we want someone smarter, more diplomatic, and wiser than us in that position?

I am tired of sensational journalism.

I am upset that candidates are not fighting on platforms and ideas - but instead on personal relationships (those real and or not.)

I angry that the women's movement made great strides backwards during this election. There were relentless personal attacks on Mrs. Clinton and no one - not Nancy Pelosi, Barbara Boxer, nor Dianne Feinstein or ANY democratic leader stood up for her publicly when she was called moody, or some ridiculous author on PBS made comment on being sick of her pant suits. How about the crying thing - I heard grown men on the radio say "WAAAAA!!!! Vote for meeeee."

I am also really upset that Mrs. Clinton was held to a different standard then that any other candidate. Countless delegates and people were interviewed saying they were tuning in to Mrs.Clinton's speech at the convention because they wanted to see if she was sincere or not. WTF - When Ted Kennedy lost to Jimmy Carter he just ignored him. Did anyone go postal on him - I DON'T THINK SO!!

I am tired of election guides that don't really help me figure out what we are voting on - argument for proposition X, argument against the argument for proposition X and so on...

I am tired of "I am (fill in name) and I approve this message" - REALLY? DUH!!

Enough ranting - I need to make dinner for my kid.

Ode to my black chandelier

"How do I love thee?
Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of being and idea Grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight?"

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Shallow - maybe. True - absolutely!

Beauty feeds my soul...PERIOD!

What would Carla Bruni do?

So you all know who Carla Bruni is right - she is the model, turned singer, turned actress, turned first lady of France.

I have been giving her some thought lately - and I am impressed. Yes, you heard me I said impressed.

Carla is her own woman, she is wise in the way of men, sex, politics, etc. and she is smart as hell. Not your ordinary super-model.

She has transcended her rock and roll love affairs, nude photo's, inappropriate (by American Standards) comments both those under her breath and on the record. She is beautiful! She is educated. She recently married the conservative French president Sarkozy and France is enchanted with her. So much so that Sarko's ratings have improved.Matter of fact - all of Europe is enchanted.

Carla is brilliant - she gets what Princess Diana (whom I adored) and the various others, who have since fallen into historical oblivion, did not. She knows how to play the game and she is good at it. Carla has charmed the entire British royal family most especially it's male members with her charm,intelligence and image, even England's PM. Rule #1 she looked fantastic - she played the princess role like none other. She was smart, witty, charming, demure (Rules 2-5).

What I like about Carla is that she is who she is. She is not trying to be anyone else just herself.

She plays the game well - one might think that when you play the game you are not being yourself - THINK AGAIN we are multi-faceted creatures that have many personas to fit many situations. Knowing how to be yourself with the many aspects of yourself is self-actualization and not you trying to be someone else.

So lately when difficult situations arise I ask myself - WHAT WOULD CARLA DO?

Being lied to - Carla would call you on it, light a cigarette and blow smoke in your face. Kiss you on both cheeks while giggling and telling you to get lost, she would then walk away laughing and NOT look back (because you no longer exist).

Being cut off on the road - if she were driving she would zip past your car in her convertible while blasting Serge Gainsbourg in the background. Hair blowing in the wind and again laughing as she tossed her head back - never ever looking at you (remember you do not exist).

Being cheated on - she would show up at the event you both were supposed to come to together. She would flirt furiously and successfully with your best friend while you are NOT watching (remember her goal is not that you see, but that she regains the upper hand for herself) and goes off to have passionate sex with him/her. She has singlehandedly been discreet, gotten back at you, figuratively flipped you off - all while having fun and you not knowing your were just screwed twice....hah!

SEE WHAT I MEAN - posing the WHAT WOULD CARLA DO question fits all situations. Just try it yourself.

Anyway I need to get back to work...more on WHAT WOULD CARLA DO LATER...

DI

Happy New Year...

I have been hearing so many people wish others Happy New Years - with an "S". Happy New Year, it's Happy New Year.