Star light, star bright...grant the wish I wish tonight...

This incredible room. This suits me on so many levels. The colors are perfect. The light divine. The mix of traditional and modern, casual and formal make it much like me.




A huge gorgeous closet that I can sit and relax, or hang with friends and drink wine and laugh.




This dining room. So spacious and not overly done. It feels like home.




This bedroom.




This amazing powder room. Just look at the colors. Amazing.



Lots of laughter, with close friends and family. (image borrowed from photographer Sarah Peet's website - check it out, she is incredibly talented.) www.sarahpeetphotography.com





Prosperity, but really more direct. Money and lots of it. Without having to lose someone I love, without doing something illegal, and without having to live in misery to get it.




A Chanel, 20s inspired outfit.



An apartment in Paris.

For the next wedding I plan...

for a client of course. I would love to create this staircase for the bride to walk down. Isn't it amazing?

Beautiful Men

Robert Pattison



Alejandro Fernandez

I wish...

A Year of Di Speaks...

This is a Facebook application that takes a random sampling of your posts throughout the year. I love mine...

More Eyes for Iris

Good idea for my kitchen.

I love the hanging lamp over the sink and the stained glass piece is perfect - this really would work well in my kitchen.

I want this lamp, actually I want this room...

Beautiful Sean's

Sean Connery


My Husband Sean.

Diana, Goddess of the Hunt

I love images of Diana...

Toss that shower curtain...

and save up for one of these. Love how clean the look is. I might frost the mid section for modesty, if it were for my home. I like clean and sleek.

This room is perfect

Minus the wall-to-wall, I do not like carpeting. I must prefer hardwood floors with area rugs.

This room is perfection to me. I love everything about it. The color, the gold accent, how clean the design is, the mix of styles.

Must have this lamp!

Groovy Polaroid Program...

The Family



Sean in Golden Gate Park



Alexa and Allegra

Marie Antoinette, for Allegra

My favorite era for fashion...

My working hands...

Of course I am the one in black. Here I am at Nancy and Ulla's Paper Shoes Class. I had such a great time and loved the creative energy of the women in the class. The teachers were adorable and quite incredible.

Inspiration for another room....

I love surfers

On my shopping list...er, rather my wish list.

Lucy and Mina

The two female characters in Bram Stoker's Dracula - Mina Harker and Lucy Westenra

You are cordially invited...

More chandeliers

I want...

Summer in the city...

Omens...

So today was a funny day. I took one of those silly Facebook quizzes, "What is your goth name". The name that came up was Omen. Ha ha, I posted it and went on.

Then, I continued to read my book the Achemist because I had to wait around all day as the window installers who repaired and installed all day long. So as I am reading the young man in the story is often told by the wise men to see the omens. I read it so many times, that I considered it am omen. My own message. As I had posted before, there is change coming and I just need to follow the omens. I need to heed the messages. I need to observe with open eyes. I need to move with the flow.

I cannot wait to see where I am taking me...

These times, they are a changin'

Do you know when you life is about to change? Really change, the kind of change that you remember all of your life.

I remember the day I moved to San Francisco. I was the first one awake. I laid in bed, looking around, listening to the sounds of my old home before anyone stirred. I remember that morning thinking - my life after today will never be the same.

I remember my first night in San Francisco. An almost empty apartment with the sounds of the city in the background; the sound of my steam heater and the wonderfully comfortable feeling in my new home, my first home. As a lay in bed, before falling asleep, full of hope and joy. I thought - my life as of today will never be the same.

I remember the day I broke up with my long time boyfriend Mark. I knew a change needed to happen, but I was not sure when or how. I remember the day he moved out. Tears, lots of tears, not of sadness but of relief. I was free. I laid in bed with my cat, again in an almost empty apartment and thought - my life after today will never be the same.

I remember the last day of my last job. It was tough, A few officers wanted me to leave because I had become to powerful in my position; the board president would not and could not have it that way. I had been raked through the coals for months. But on that last day, as I sat in my beautiful office. Heart heavy with the many many calls from well wishers, and the love of those who did not want me to leave. I found myself alone. It was quiet and very still. I became excited at the possibility of what could be. And at that moment I said to myself - my life as of today will never be the same.

When my daughter was born. That night. I laid in bed with this teeney little baby whom I have known for lifetimes. The one who held the key to my heart and my soul. It was still and quiet in the room, the lights were dimmed. I could hear the distant sounds of voices of the nurses at their station. I stared at my daughter with wonder and deep love. I took a deep breath and thought - my life as of today will never be the same.

I feel there is change that is about to happen. I am not sure when or what. But it is coming. I need to find my path once again, except this time there will be peace along the path. Maybe not peace from others, but peace within myself. Will I be moving, will it be my career, what will it be? Honestly, it doesn't matter does it. Because I know, that at the end of it - I will lie in my bed and think - my life as of today will never be the same. And it will all be good...

Who doesn't love Joey Ramone?

I love this dude. The first time I went to see the Ramones, was in the late 70s in Santa Cruz. I was hooked, loved them, loved the energy.

Good boy, good boy...good dog!

I want a dog, not just any dog, this dog. I fell in love with one I saw at the San Francisco Farmers Market a few Saturday's ago and have been obsessing since. It is a Shibu Inu, the oldest breed of dog that comes from Japan. I want this dog, okay, if I can't have this dog then I want a german sheppard.

Good boy, now sit, good boy. Give mama a kiss, good boooooooy!

Somewhere, three brothers reunite...

Thank you for all you have done for the people of our great country.

Johnny and June

This just may be the best photo ever.

Fuck You!

Today I am in the middle of a conversation. It seemed important, I listened, I heard, I gave my opinion. And, I was told that what I had to say was not important, not going to be considered because I was too easy to put down. My face dropped, tears welled, whoa, it felt like a gun shot. So I calmly said, why don't you try that again. I was flatly told that they felt pinned against the wall by me and that they were being set up. Again, and even a more deliberate calm question, why don't you try that again. Nothing...

My heart pounded, my stomach hurt, I no longer had spit in my mouth.

"What you have to say is not important and so easy to put down"...I have no words for what an insult that really is. No apologies came, no clarification, nothing, just storming off, yelling you pushed my buttons.

Well you know what, FUCK YOU!

Crap!

Okay so here is the latest update - they found a mass on my other breast. Yep, you heard me the OTHER breast. The good news is the mass they found is benign. But the surgeon and the pathologist strongly recommend that I need to have another lumpectomy because they need to make sure there is no cancer forming in the mass. In other words they want to make sure there is no insitu.

I am grateful, not scared any more. But another surgery...ah, man. No one should have to have two lumpectomies in one year...right?

Another Cancer Aha...

I am not over mourning the loss of a huge chunk of my breast. I have always said my breasts were perfect - they were, or they are. God I can't even write it.

I have been thinking about why I am not losing any weight (yes I am exercising and yes I eat half of what I used to) and I have come up with that I am having a physical crisis of the spirit. I have lost part of me, and maybe that part of me that doesn't know better is hanging on to the me that I want to lose.

More later...I need to go to bed and attempt to sleep.

Mammogram

My mammogam is tomorrow morning. The first since surgery - the last one I had was awful, I had all of these 5 inch needles sticking out my breast. I am anxious, nervous and dare I say a little scared.

The best gifts ever...

I have a friend Andrea who gives me the best gifts ever. Andrea, is a poet, an artist, a musician, a singer, and a muse. Honestly, she is a long time tribe member and I swear she is a goddess.

One day many years ago, Andrea and her mom, Alexis stop by for a visit with a box for me. It seems they had just been to an antique fair and found this entire box of vintage lace with bits and bobs of beaded pieces. All estimated be be from the early 1900s. I cherish this gift to this day. I keep promising myself that I will use the lace - but I cannot seem to separate the lace from one another.

Another time, Andrea and her mom came to visit me after the birth of my daughter Allegra. They came with this small pair of velvet beaded boots that they made themselves. Can you imagine - they were the most precious things ever. I will pass them on to Allegra's children so they can pass them on to my grand children.

But wait there is more - Andrea has come all the way from Jenner just to sit and sing to me - she is the best gift giver ever.

In the past 10 years we have sent one another care packages - loaded with goodies from Italian cherries to crimson red candles, and all sorts of wonderful baubles and trinkets. The biggest joy I have is putting one of my packages together for her because I know it will make her happy - every bit no matter how large or small is individually wrapped with beautiful paper and ribbons. Happiness in a box!

Andrea is definitely one of the most generous people I know, not just for her gifts, but for her never ending open door, open mindedness, open arms, strong shoulders to cry on, and contagious laugh. That she will dance with me at a drop of a hat, and that she will sing to me any time of the day or night. I love her for her ability to love life and others, and I am overjoyed when she is in love with someone and has once or twice come into my office and swooned onto the floor (freaking out my assistant). I cherish Andrea because she looks at life the way you are supposed to - with the wide eyed wonder and the joy that emanates from deep in one's heart.

Sanctuary...

Where do you go when you need to breathe?

A strange kind of love, a strange kind of feeling...

So do you remember all of those concerts you went to when you were young and you felt the singer was singing to you.  It is an actual phenomena you know.  I have been to many concerts in my life, I have been wandering aimlessly through the audience, I would sit, I would stand, I would dance, I would lean against the stage and would happily and merrily think the song was being dedicated to me.  I do not want to hear about being a narcissist, this isn't what this is about.

A few nights ago, I went to hear Peter Murphy perform.  I love Peter Murphy, I mean it is not just the music which I love, the lyrics which make me cry, nor that he was so beautiful and now as an older man, he is still beautiful and more soulful in a very different way. It isn't that he was and probably still is the king of his genre, I think that it is when we went to see him perform when I was about 7 months pregnant and I had an alchemical reaction to his music.  I don't know, but I just love him.  Not a gaga love, but the peaceful kind of love that you feel toward your yogi.

Anyway, back to my story.  I thought it would be a really great idea to surprise my husband with an early birthday gift to an undercover Peter Murphy show at Bimbos here in San Francisco.  We went, took our positions about 3-5 feet from the stage and enjoyed the show. When he came to our side as I stood there a cosmo in one hand and my fan (oh the hot flashes) in the other and blew him a kiss. Later, he sings one of my favorite songs, "Fall with your Knife" and I swear I had a connection to him - Peter Murphy was singing to ME!  I turned my husband and said "I don't care what anyone says it felt like Peter was singing to me."  My husband looked at me quite seriously and said "OH NO DI, HE WAS DEFINITELY SINGING TO YOU, Peter Murphy sang and blew a kiss to my wife! We have to talk about this later."

Ha! He WAS singing to me.  Not just my imagination...

My husband later explains to me that he saw Peter singing to me and burst into joyful tears.  I think that my husband also had an alchemical bond with him when I was pregnant so many years ago, plus he knows how much I adore him. Anyway, both Peter and his guitarist noticed his emotion and acknowledged him.  All very sweet and touching.

This concert will remain in my heart always - not just because my favorite song was sung to by my favorite artist, but Peter's music has become an anthem to the times in my life, both good and bad.  

I know this concert will become urban legend and people will talk about it 20 years from now, but I will always remember it as the concert in which I had a connection to Peter Murphy. 

Peace and Love, Di